Research Theme 3

Perceptions of autonomy amongst older people living alone: Summary

 The project aim was to explore how older people who live alone experience autonomy in their lives. More of us are living alone at all ages. In a society which assumes all adults are half of a couple, we need more understanding of what life is like for those of us who are single.

I advertised for people to take part in an interview with me. This was either online or by phone, depending upon preference. Thirty-nine people took part in an interview. Six found me through Facebook, one through twitter, two were told about the study by friends, one person contacted me after seeing a piece about my research and 29 were recruited from u3a. I am grateful to all the people who generously gave their time to talk with me.

Overview of findings

I carried out 55 interviews between June 2022 and December 2023. Twenty-four people were interviewed once, 14 took part in two interviews, and one participated in three interviews. Thirty-two participants were women and seven were men. Ages ranged between 58 and 90, with the largest number being in their 70s. Three lived in Scotland, three in Wales, two in Ireland and the rest were scattered around England. Length of time living alone as an adult ranged from one to 53 years.

How people came to be living alone varied: 25 were divorced, 16 widowed and 4 were single by choice. Some people have been divorced and widowed. Of the four who described themselves as single by choice, two have always lived alone as an adult and two had previously been in a relationship.

Participants had varied backgrounds. They had all worked, and some continued to do so, often on a voluntary basis. Their current range of interests and activities was wide, from things such as travelling, walking or gardening, to crafting, singing in a choir, reading, theatre, cinema.

Some had families who lived locally, but others either had no surviving family, or their family members lived a long way away. Friends and neighbours were thus an important source of social contact for most, and at least one participant stated that their main contact was with the person on the supermarket checkout. Many experienced loneliness sometimes, and a small number regularly. Even participants who were very active outside the house spent most of their time alone.

Not everyone liked living alone, but everyone valued their independence. Participants described autonomy in terms of having the freedom to make choices and then to act on those choices. This was in terms of the everyday decisions that we all have to make, such as what and when to eat, or when to go to bed and when to get up. But it also, of course, covered the bigger decisions. For a small number of people, who had been in controlling relationships in the past, this sense of being in control of their own lives was invaluable.

People identified a number of things which could promote their sense of autonomy. Having a reasonable income, being in good health and fit, owning a car were common factors that people felt helped them maintain their independence. Certain character traits were also seen as important, such as having learned to be independent from a young age, being well motivated, being self-reliant, or not worrying about what other people think.

On the whole, participants felt in control of their lives. However, they all acknowledged the existence of constraints. Lack of money, a limited social circle and poor health were commonly cited as constraints, as was the state, which exerts a level of control which can limit choices.

Participants also acknowledged the existence of possible future threats to their autonomy. Concern was expressed about the possibility of cognitive decline or physical debility which could lead to a need for high levels of support. Two reported that they would prefer to enter a care home, rather than have carers support them in their current home. Most participants would want to stay at home, but a few expressed the pragmatic view that some things cannot be controlled and they would make the best of whatever happens. Others, however, expressed a strong desire to avoid care home entry at all costs. It is worth noting, perhaps, that the Office for National Statistics recorded at the 2021 census for England and Wales record that 2.7% of adults over the age of 65 live in a communal setting. The level of support for the legalisation of assisted dying in the UK was surprisingly high.

Conclusion

The people who took part in this research study were a group with mixed backgrounds and experiences. They were thoughtful about their lives and willing to share those thoughts. Society has always been subject to change, but the pace of that change is gaining momentum. While it was important for participants to feel in control of own lives that is, at times, challenging when you live alone. The future can appear threatening, in its uncertainty. People do try and plan for the future, but while planning offers hope it cannot confer certainty that one’s wishes will come to fruition.